“There’s no place like home for the holidays” and Maria Wilcox — president of the Wilton Woman’s Club and accounting and finance specialist at Circle of Care — should know. She’s a jingle all the way woman, (even without the real tree). If you love the season of perpetual hope, for sure, this one goes out to you, because Maria has set the bar high when it comes to not only volunteering in the community but setting the example for how to find the joy and purpose in everything she does.
GMW‘s Lesley Kirschner stole a few minutes for a quick interview with Maria for some great tips and Wilton wisdom.
1. Our town continues to see an influx of new families, especially since COVID. With that being said, what advice would you give to newcomers maybe looking to feel a part of the community and/or make lasting connections?
Wilcox: Be active. Be active outside your home. Join any club that you can join, any church or synagogue, exercise class. Just do something outside your home to connect with other people.
So when we moved here my kids were maybe three and four and I got involved in their preschool, like on the board and the PTAs. I was always involved with something in the community — the Wilton Youth Council, Ambler Farm.
Then somebody said to me, ‘When you’re a mom, you should have something that’s only yours.’ So I joined the board of the Family and Children’s Agency where I served for like 15 years.
So that was my thing. I got out of the house. I was on the finance committee (I’m a CPA by trade). I was always the treasurer of the organization because that’s what I’m comfortable with, that’s what I do. I was always the girl with the cash box.
But I would say be a room mom, volunteer in your kid’s classroom… just anything you can do to get out of the house and physically meet other people. It goes a long way.
2. You’re connected with a number of charitable organizations in town. How did you first become involved with Circle of Care — and for readers who don’t know, can you give us a glimpse into what Circle of Care is and maybe how people can get involved if they want to volunteer or support the organization? [Editor’s note: Circle of Care is a Wilton-based organization that supports families of children with cancer throughout Connecticut. Since its inception, Circle of Care has helped 3,600 families and provided over $5 million in services to families in need.]
Wilcox: So my very good friend, Lisa Williams, worked there for a number of years and she told me they had lost their accountant. I knew the co-founder and current co-executive director Liz Salguero from the Woman’s Club and other co-founder and current Board Treasurer Dawn Ladenheim, and they knew I loved numbers, [laughs].
And I just wanted a job that was less than 20 hours a week and less than 10 minutes from my house, and at first I was fearful because volunteering is different but then I thought about it and thought I should try it and I did and I knew my work was there and my knowledge was there and it’s great. It’s like 15 hours a week. I go into the office. I get out of my house and see people.
But Lisa Willams is the one who is in charge of all the volunteers and if you go to the website you can see all the different ways there are to get involved and help. Right now we are collecting gifts for kids who are in treatment. We wrap them up and deliver them to the families and John Priest (AKA Buddy the Elf) helps out. There’s a team of people who deliver them around the state. We really cover Connecticut,
Westchester and part of Massachusetts (like the Springfield area) and smaller hospitals who don’t have their own infrastructure to support the needs of the community. So we do fundraisers and friendraisers and it’s nice to get a little bit of money but it’s really nice to get your message out because you never know who is going to hear your message. You never know who is going to be affected and who you will reach so it’s important to just keep talking and keep connecting. I’m a real believer in that.
3. The Wilton Woman’s Club does so much for the community… the annual Fashion Show, the Thanksgiving Luncheon for Seniors, stocking the food pantry… as the president of WWC, what would you say to prospective members who are maybe on the fence about joining? What sets the Woman’s Club apart?
Wilcox: I would say we are a group of all ages. Some people worry that we are only women in our 50s. But we definitely aren’t that. One of our members just had her first child. Our former president had two young kids when she was on the board who were under the age of six so we definitely range in ages and stages.
I said before, you should always have one thing that is just yours, even if it’s just one hour a week. I would say we are definitely service-based but we don’t require anyone to do anything. But the more you use the club, the more you are going to get out of it.
The Woman’s Club is a place to connect, learn, bond, grow; a place to support the community. We’re supporting the community. If there’s a business in town, a cause in town we can support, that’s what we do. We have meetings in the afternoons, in the evenings to support a range of needs and schedules. It’s for everyone and anyone who wants to be a part of it.
There’s an event coming up where we help serve the seniors lunch and it’s from 11a.m.-2 p.m. but even if someone was just able to come for setup or cleanup, we’re flexible. Come for part of it, whatever you can do. The saying, “many hands make light work” — that’s really true.
4. “I don’t have time to volunteer!” it’s a common sentiment, especially around the holidays when everyone is caught up in the hustle and bustle of the most wonderful time of the year. Why is it important to volunteer and what are some ways busy people can make a difference when time is in short supply and that shelf elf isn’t going to move itself?
Wilcox: One thing that’s really helped me in my life is remembering that small things are sometimes just as good as big things.
If you join the Woman’s Club and you go once to the food pantry in Stamford and bring food back [to Wilton], that’s perfect. You can do something once. You don’t have to do it every month. You can just do it one little bit. One little bit goes a long way. You’ll be touched by going to Stamford, getting produce and frozen meat and stocking the food pantry; and knowing that you’ve helped people in your own town have access to fresh food. You’ll be touched. That will touch you. And you only have to do it once. And a volunteer commitment, like the Woman’s Club isn’t something that’s necessarily every week or even every month. Our events, our service projects are one off so that’s a great thing, right?
So if you don’t have a lot of time, I get it. You don’t have to be there for every event. You can help with one small thing. You can sign up to bring green beans for the holiday meal and the green bean person is just as important as the turkey person. And you’re helping someone.You’re helping someone in town and you’re brightening somebody’s spirit. And when you look at it that way, it becomes less of a chore.
5. Tis’ the season for “did I really sign up for one more meal train” and my 14-year-old inevitably adding a hairdryer that costs more than my vacuum cleaner to her Amazon Wish List. What do you hold near and dear this time of year and what could you do without?
Near and dear — my big Italian family. Every year we have a big family gathering. There’s like a hundred of us in New Jersey in this big hall. My grandmother was one of nine kids so it’s pretty awesome. We’ve only missed it once or twice maybe on account of the weather. But anytime the family is together, anytime the family is around it’s just huge for me. I always plan to make sure I have family time and that event really kicks off our holiday.
I’m a holiday person. My parents always created so much magic around the holidays. It’s still really special to me. I’m a huge believer. I love all the hope. I love the Christmas music, the cards — I’m all in.
But what could I do without? For the past five or six years now, we’ve done without a tree. I used to say I would never, ever go without a real tree but they’re always a mess, everyone is arguing and what were we really getting out of that? What was important was decorating it with the family. The tree itself didn’t mean anything to me.
So if you don’t like writing holiday cards, don’t do it. If you don’t get joy out of it, don’t do it. So we have a fake tree, which I never thought we would have so I guess that’s what I do without.
I don’t know. I’m constantly trying to evolve but if you’re not happy, why aren’t you happy? And if you’re not happy doing something, why are you doing it? I guess that’s all I would say.