Phyllis Margaret Anderson Tousey, 102, of Wilton, passed away peacefully at her home in Wilton  on Monday, Feb. 23. Phyllis was born on April 30, 1923 in Jamestown, NY to Florence Anna May Fisk Anderson and C. Raymond Anderson.  Jamestown provided her a full life growing up, with its Swedish culture and enjoyable summers spent on Chautauqua Lake. She graduated from Jamestown High School in 1941 where she played the clarinet in the marching band and attended Grove City College for her freshman year before returning home to help with the war effort. She worked at Jamestown Royal Furniture before moving on to work at a local law firm.  

On August 19, 1950, Phyllis married U.S. Navy Lt. Cmdr. Thomas Grandison Tousey in Jamestown. They moved to Falls Church, VA in 1951 when Lt. Cmdr. Tousey was recalled to naval active duty due to the onset of the Korean War. Their two daughters, Robin and Noel, were born at Bethesda Naval Hospital and Phyllis came to appreciate the camaraderie of the many military wives who lived in their neighborhood.  

After the Korean War, the family relocated to Wilton, in November 1954 when Tom resumed his position at Socony Mobil Oil Company in New York City. Back then Wilton was a pretty small town with minimal services and Phyllis had to fend for herself a lot as the wife of a NY commuter. Their son Terry was born in Wilton during the flood of October 1955.  

Phyllis dedicated her life to raising her children. She was an active volunteer in all their academic, sport and social lives. She was a Girl Scout leader, cafeteria mom and, of course, a chauffeur! Phyllis even became an ever faithful member of Walter Schalk’s costume production team. She was also a devoted member of Our Lady of Fatima Church (OLF), joining a year after the parish had opened.  

Phyllis was a real “trooper” as her husband Tom believed in seeing America and would take the family on month-long vacations each year throughout the United States and Canada in an Apache tent trailer. This frontier life was another unexpected experience for Phyllis but she endured and made many lifetime friends along the back roads and campgrounds and national parks the family travelled.

Upon the passing of her beloved husband Tom in 1975, Phyllis decided to change career paths from stay-at-home housewife and mother to become a professional working woman. She accepted an administrative position at the Wilton Town Hall and eventually became the tax collector for the Town until her retirement in 1993. For those who worked with her, she was always known for being kind and helpful to anyone who needed assistance.  

After retirement Phyllis spent time traveling, visiting friends, and working out at the YMCA. She followed a regular routine of swimming, and participating in exercise classes at the Wilton Senior Center in addition to maintaining an active social life. Stay At Home Wilton became a vibrant part of her life where old friendships were renewed and new ones emerged. There were many parties along the way celebrating her numerous milestones including her retirement party at age 70, and her 90th and 100th birthday parties. Her 100th birthday party was attended by over 100 friends, young and old, a testament to the number of people she touched throughout her life.

Phyllis was determined to age in place in her own home and ultimately she got her wish. She was able to reside in the house she shared with her family for over 70 years until the day she passed. Many people helped make this possible including her constant companion and home care provider, Pretty, who never left her side for the last five years.

Phyllis is survived by her three children, Robin Tousey-Ayers (Ken), Noel Lamb (Bruce) and Terry Tousey; as well as four grandchildren, Kristi Hunt (Brian), Sarah Lamb, Dmitry Ayers and Nikolay Ayers; and two great grandchildren, Hailey Hunt and Lily Hunt.

Family and friends are invited to pay their respects at the Bouton Funeral Home (31 W. Church St., Georgetown) on Wednesday, Mar. 4, from 4-7 p.m. A mass will be held at Our Lady of Fatima Church in Wilton on Thursday morning, Mar. 5 at 10:30 a.m.  Phyllis will be laid to rest next to her loving husband at Arlington National Cemetery later this year. 

In lieu of flowers donations may be made in Phyllis’s honor to Stay at Home Wilton, Wilton Senior Center and Our Lady of Fatima Church.