Back in March, the Wilton Lacrosse Association inducted Trish Weber into its Hall of Fame. Weber grew up in Wilton and played for famed lacrosse coach Guy Whitten as a member of the Wilton High School class of 1984, when she was known then as Trish Knapp. She played lacrosse at Bates College and has stayed involved in the sport as an adult, even when she and her husband, Scott, and their children moved back to Wilton in 2004.
Not only is she a coach in Wilton’s girls’ youth lacrosse program, Weber also trains other youth coaches around the country, teaching them how to instill skill, confidence, and teamwork in their players. We asked her some questions as part of our GOOD Morning Wilton’s “5 Questions With…” series.
1. Looking back on your years of playing lacrosse, what would you say was the best thing about the experience?
Trish Weber: It’s hard to say there was any one best thing as there were so many, but I’d say overall, the sport taught me who I was and who I wanted to be and clearly helped to establish my sense of self. I’m a direct result of Title IX and I’m grateful every day that that law was passed and that I had the chance to participate in sports, and I can’t fathom who I would have become without playing. Both my High School and College playing experiences created who I am today. Not in the wins and losses but in the daily commitment to being a part of a community that stood for something bigger than you as an individual.
It taught me respect and honor; it taught me grace and humility; it taught me pride, loyalty and camaraderie; it taught me how to self advocate and to stand up for what I believe in; it taught me to not fear competition and to embrace challenges with courage and conviction.
I’m not sure that I realized all of this until long after I was off the field, but I can surely say that my career and life have been shaped and guided by what I learned on a lacrosse field. There is also something special about lacrosse that it has this effect when other sports, at least for me, do not.
2. When you found out you were being inducted into the WLA Hall of Fame, what did that mean and how did it feel?
TW: Of course I was honored and I cried. LOL! It’s rewarding when your work is recognized but that’s not why you do it. It’s, of course, validating to know that your work has been acknowledged and gratifying to know that your passion, commitment and dedication mean something to others, but it’s extremely humbling, because the fact is that being on a lacrosse field fuels me and gives me possibly more than I give to it.
3. How has lacrosse in Wilton changed since you were a player?
TW: YIKES…you might need to write a book in order to cover all that. When I first played we had wooden sticks and there were no boundaries, no lines at all except for the circle around the goal and the circle in the middle. We played on what is now North Field and there was a big tree as well as the stream and the parking lot, so those were our boundaries. There were no goggles and our positions had different names, such as first, second and third home for attack, and point, cover point and third man for defense.
I really had to relearn the game when I started coaching. Beyond the play of the game, the Wilton Lacrosse Association was founded and girls are now able to start playing in first grade, whereas I did not have the opportunity to play until ninth grade. It’s amazing what Guy Whitten and Barbara Bowditch were able to do with a bunch of kids who never picked up a stick until they were freshmen.
Both the girls and boys high school players are incredibly talented now and watching them play is awe-inspiring. While we always had a good program, it is now exceptional thanks in part to the work of the WLA.
4. Now, you’re involved as a youth coach and also work to train other coaches around the country—tell us a little about the work you do for that, and what are some of the things you want the athletes you coach as well as the players for the coaches you teach to take away from playing the game?
TW: I’m proud to be a part of the US Lacrosse Coaches Education Program. This program did not exist when I first started coaching and boy would it have been helpful. The program was started by US Lacrosse in 2004 to address the exponential growth of the sport. So many parents are asked/begged to get out on the field and coach and are then left to their own devices–good, bad or indifferent–to figure it out. That’s just not right.
Just because you played doesn’t mean you are a good coach. Additionally, there are a ton of enthusiastic dads who want to coach their daughters, which is great–but boys’ and girls’ lacrosse are two completely different sports with different rules, so we have to be vigilant about making sure that each sport is taught properly and that respect is given to the differences of each genders’ game.
We have a responsibility to insure that each and every child is having a positive learning experience when they set foot on that lacrosse field. Far too many times I’ve witnessed a lack of knowledge and or a lack of propriety in a coach’s conduct, which then leads to kids not learning how to play properly as well as learning bad behavior. Coaches’ education program trainers provide the skills, the knowledge of how to coach the game properly, as well as the principles in how to coach young children in a positive way that is both nurturing and corrective.
US Lacrosse has partnered with Positive Coaching Alliance and so all of our teaching is rooted in the PCA principles that are so simple: Winning is important and we will strive to win–but teaching and learning life lessons are even more important.
Shockingly, 70-percent of kids drop out of youth sports by the age of 13 because they feel it’s not fun. That’s a crime! Our goal with US Lacrosse is to impress upon these coaches the number of children’s lives they impact and to do so with care and consideration. We have trained close to 5,000 coaches to date. With an average of 20 kids per team, that is 200,000 children who are being coached properly. I’m surprised by how many sports don’t have oversight and a commitment to insuring the proper training of those who are affecting the future of their sport.
5. With many young families having moved to Wilton, whose children may not yet be involved in organized team sports, what would you tell them about what their children can get from playing lacrosse? What should they know?
All sports should be, first and foremost, fun! Lacrosse is a super fun sport that requires patience and dedication to learning. Young children should have fun and play games to learn about the sport and just have fun learning to catch and throw and cradle on the run. Good stick skills with both the left and right hand are really important to success at the higher level. So start early with learning to catch, throw, cradle and shoot with both hands. Young kids don’t know the difference so start them doing both right from the beginning.
All sports provide so many teachable moments about life skills. If you allow your child to get out on a field and have fun, embrace mistakes as a pathway to learning, and always put forth a great effort, then it should be a positive experience for everyone.