Experts Describe Biggest Mental Health Challenges Facing Wilton, Urge Residents to Reach Out for Help

Wilton children are experiencing mental health problems at younger ages, sometimes before appropriate treatment options are readily available. Parents are struggling with burnout, families are navigating anxiety and substance use, and some older residents face financial pressures and isolation.

Those were among the concerns local mental health professionals, school officials and community providers described during an Oct. 22 discussion at the Riverbrook Regional YMCA. Alongside their warnings came a repeated message: Residents do not have to figure out where to find help on their own.

The Community Conversation on Mental Health was organized by Wilton Youth Council and co-hosted by Riverbrook Regional YMCA and Northwell Health. It brought together as panelists Wilton Public Schools Director of Climate, Community, Wellness and Belonging Kim Zemo; Wilton Social Services Director Stephanie Rowe; Wilton’s Deputy Police Chief Robert Cipolla; parent coach and National Alliance on Mental Illness [NAMI] facilitator Vanessa Elias; and Yale Child Study Center psychologist Dr. Jackie Britt-Friedman. Yale psychologist and youth suicide prevention researcher Dr. Christine Cha moderated.

Speaking to an audience of about 75 people, the panelists described a network of collaboration among Wilton’s schools, police, Social Services Department and outside providers. But they also acknowledged that residents may know little about that work — or the services they can access before a problem becomes a crisis.

Problems Appearing Earlier, With Gaps in Care

The panelists had ready answers when it came to describing the kinds of mental health issues they’re seeing the most in the community. The concerns were observations from panelists’ work with families and residents, rather than findings from a comprehensive assessment of how widespread each problem is in Wilton.

Zemo identified a troubling mismatch between the needs schools are seeing and the treatment available.

“We’re seeing mental health issues happening younger and younger without the appropriate resources to match students at that age group,” she said, adding that getting support to kids who need it is made harder because that support may not even exist.

She described increases in depression and anxiety, eating disorders since the pandemic, and hateful, mean or threatening language among younger students — something she surmised comes from exposure through gaming and online media. She also expressed concern about the messages young people receive about cannabis following its legalization for adults.

Britt-Friedman said anxiety extends beyond children and adolescents to their parents, who are contending with achievement pressures, broader cultural and political tensions, and the difficulty of managing children’s digital lives. “When parents aren’t okay, kids aren’t okay generally,” she said.

Often parents are overwhelmed just by where to start searching for resources. “There’s a lot of compulsive use [in kids] with digital media and access to potential harms, and parents being under pressure and not knowing what to do,” Britt-Friedman said.

Elias echoed the point about parental burnout as well as other concerns families have brought to her about how to deal with what their children are able to access on their own.

“I’m seeing cannabis being a massive problem — addiction, psychosis and also CHS or cannabis hyperemesis syndrome. Gambling and sports betting — parents coming to me because their kid has just lost $4,000. The impact of porn on their sexual health — porn is sex ed for many of these kids,” Elias said.

Cipolla also pointed to the content that kids are exposed to online. “You conceivably have your child on a screen watching something innocent on YouTube, and that ad’s going to pop up, and they’re going to be exposed to something you weren’t expecting,” he said.

While much of the focus is on youth when the negative impact of social media is discussed, Cipolla said online harassment and cyberbullying are also adult problems. “I think it’s part of this bigger national issue of just outraged culture, people are searching for things to be angry about, and doing it from a keyboard rather than in a real-life social connection makes it seem seemingly much more easy to do.”

Rowe said even when clients do not explicitly identify mental health as the reason they need help from Social Services, her team sees anxiety reflected in residents’ everyday concerns. “We see the behaviors of anxiety,” she said.

“So while people aren’t walking in and saying, ‘Oh, I have anxiety or depression,’ we can see based on the conversations we have with them, the line at the door, making sure that they’re able to get the exact food they want,” she said, adding, “We see how it affects the day to day.”

Rowe said 55% of the town food pantry’s clients are older than 60 and living on fixed incomes, and broader economic pressures contribute to their anxiety.

Gaps in Care Leave Families Struggling to Find the Next Step

Recognizing a mental health crisis and getting someone to a hospital does not necessarily mean they will have access to the ongoing treatment they need. Panelists described a fragmented system in which families — and the professionals helping them — struggle to navigate referrals, waiting lists, insurance requirements and gaps between levels of care.

Cipolla said even the range of available resources can be overwhelming for police responding in the field. Officers can arrange a hospital assessment when someone poses a threat to themselves or others, but that person may be evaluated and released before the officers’ shift ends, leaving concerns about what help follows.

“It’s the element of well, what’s the long-term sustainable treatment and approach to get this person impactful help? That’s the frustrating part we see in our work as police,” he said.

Zemo said those gaps also fall heavily on schools. Children may return from a crisis assessment still waiting for treatment, leaving school staff trying to meet needs that require more intensive care than they can provide.

“Kids can sit and wait for treatment, which can be detrimental,” she said. “Then they’re back on our doorstep, and we’re trying to fill the gaps in the schools without necessarily the appropriate resources, that level of care that the child may need. So there’s a systems issue in how we’re treating mental illness. It makes it extremely challenging — for families and the schools and the police as well.”

The panelists were encouraged by two new, dedicated spaces at nearby hospitals — Stamford Hospital’s EmPATH program and Yale New Haven Children’s Hospital’s Children’s Crisis Intervention Center — for children experiencing psychiatric crises as a promising development, while emphasizing the broader need for continuity of care.

Still, other barriers can complicate the search for help. Elias pointed to limited age-appropriate intensive treatment options for younger children, the embarrassment and stigma some families feel about seeking assistance and the difficulty of managing that search alongside other life demands.

Britt-Friedman said insurance coverage can still leave care financially out of reach. After her office began accepting insurance, she found that some families faced deductibles of thousands of dollars — potentially making their care more expensive than paying directly.

Rowe encouraged residents to use Social Services as a starting point for navigating those obstacles.

“The mental health system is like a different language,” she said. “You have to learn it… You need to know where to go. I think that’s where our department shines, that we can do that small case management.”

Her department can help residents identify providers, consider insurance coverage and connect with services suited to their circumstances. Those conversations can also uncover needs beyond the issue that initially brought someone through the door.

Partnerships Connect Families With Care and Support

Panelists described several ways Wilton’s schools, police and Social Services Department are working together to address gaps in care, respond to trauma and connect families with help earlier.

One partnership is aimed directly at the long waits families can encounter when seeking treatment. Zemo said the schools and town have used opioid settlement funds to purchase access to Cartwheel Care, a virtual mental health program that can connect children and families with services within one to two weeks.

The arrangement allows school staff to make a direct connection to care, rather than simply giving a family another provider to call. The program offers support for families as well as children, including parent coaching for families with younger children. Zemo acknowledged that virtual services are not appropriate for everyone, but said the partnership provides another option when timely help can be difficult to find.

“The quicker we can identify kids that may be at risk and offer resources, we can avoid the acute crisis,” she said.

Cipolla described another partnership, Handle With Care, that formalizes communication police and school staff had previously handled more informally. When a child experiences or witnesses a traumatic event outside school, police can notify Zemo and her team that the student may need additional care and attention during the school day. The notification, he said, helps connect what happens in a child’s life outside school with the support available inside it.

Police also have a new resource for young people involved in delinquent behavior. Cipolla said Diversion First, a voluntary program for ages 10-17, offers a longer-term approach that combines accountability with support and restorative practices.

Wilton does not have its own juvenile review board, he explained, because the volume of juvenile cases has not justified the resources needed to establish one. School resource officers have developed diversion options themselves, but the newer program offers another avenue for more sustained assistance.

“It really just provides a trauma-informed restorative approach for kids that are getting involved in delinquent acts,” Cipolla said.

The program became available in June, although Wilton had not yet used it, he said.

Students and School Staff Work to Identify Concerns Earlier

Within the schools, Zemo described efforts to recognize problems before they escalate and help students feel comfortable seeking assistance.

The high school’s student-driven Hope Squad trains students recommended by their peers as trustworthy helpers to recognize warning signs and connect classmates with an adult. Its work also includes making mental health resources more visible through activities like the student resource fair.

Students in the high school are taking the lead in several ways. Not only are Hope Squad members discussing whether the program could expand to the middle school, she said another student has proposed fundraising for a facility dog, although Zemo said it’s an idea that is still in the discussion stage.

Zemo also described staff training in restorative practices, which focus on helping students understand harm they have caused and address it through appropriate conversations and accountability.

Mental health screenings at different grade levels provide another opportunity to identify students who may need support. Zemo said the district uses several types of screening methodologies, including what she called “strength-based,” “at-risk” and “suicide” screeners.

The schools also use software called Gaggle to monitor students’ school Google accounts and online activity and flag any potentially concerning material. Zemo said the system had flagged 95 incidents of varying severity since the school year began in August.

Those notifications arrive around the clock, and depending on the level of risk, school staff may respond right away and contact families late at night. Police may be asked to conduct a wellness check if a family cannot be reached.

“Families will get calls from me at 10, 11 o’clock at night if we get notification about that,” Zemo said.

Connecting Families With Each Other — and Identifying What Is Missing

Rowe highlighted a partnership between Social Services and the schools offering a “Divorce Kids Club” as a support group for children whose families are experiencing divorce. Working with a local therapist, the group gives children an opportunity to connect with others facing similar family changes.

She said families have continued to tell the department that their children benefited from earlier groups. A four-session fall program was planned, with the possibility of another in the spring if needed.

The effort addresses a challenge Rowe encounters in her work: Different families may be struggling with the same issue without realizing others share their experience.

“Town social services is a funny one because we respect people’s privacy, but we also see the same issue happening with different families,” she said. “And you think, man, if they could just talk to each other.”

Rowe also urged residents to follow Wilton Social Services on Facebook, where the department is working to publicize its programs. Most critical for Rowe at the moment is the town’s Community Needs Assessment, which Rowe hopes more residents will complete. [Editor’s note: originally scheduled to close on Oct. 31, Rowe has extended the deadline for completing the survey to Nov. 3.]

The assessment asks about residents’ well-being, their knowledge of available services and their ability to access them. Rowe said the responses will help the department understand what is working, where improvements are needed and what needs remain unmet.

Elias noted that the assessment itself grew out of an earlier community conversation in the same room three years ago, when participants identified a townwide assessment as a priority.

For panelists, the programs illustrated both what collaboration has already made possible and why they’re hoping for continued community participation.

Support Beyond School-Age Children

The panelists also acknowledged the need to make sure the conversation expanded beyond just the mental health of Wilton’s school-age children. In addition to noting that financial security, food access and changes in family life were all elements impacting well-being, Rowe said it was important to understand just how necessary connection is for everyone, whether that be newly retired seniors whose working lives left little time to develop relationships or participate in community groups, or the “sandwich generation” caring for both children and older parents, or families going through divorce.

Maintaining those relationships can be especially difficult for adults already stretched by caregiving. Cha referenced something similar in what the Surgeon General wrote about as the epidemic of parent stress. “There’s this question of how to how to look out for yourself as you’re looking out for those around you.”

Elias said it’s something parents need to pay attention to as a part of human nature. “The pace of life is not aligned with being human, so if you’re trying to keep up, it’s impossible. We have to be the ones to reset… [and think] in terms of being human first. And that is the connection piece, and play — play for us as adults and for our children. That is really important.”

Another group in critical need of connection, according to the panelists, is young adults from age 18 into their 20s. Elias described young people returning home from college because of mental health concerns, substance use or a poor fit, and then struggling to find connection and direction.

“I think what’s important is just for the parents of those kids to know they’re not alone, and there is a whole community of kids who are lonely in their homes looking for connections,” she said.

From the audience, Wilton Library Executive Director Caroline Mandler described the library’s new series, “Not Your Quiet Library Night,” as an effort to build community for people in their 20s and 30s, as well as a panel planned in November about exploring alternatives to college for post-high school plans.

Substance Use as a Larger Concern

Part of the conversation touched on substance use and its impact on mental health, highlighting a concern for some of the panelists about the message young people take from marijuana’s legalization for adults.

Cipolla said legal availability can make cannabis seem less concerning to youth, even as police encounter medical emergencies involving people who have consumed edibles and require hospital care. He cautioned parents against assuming today’s products resemble what they may remember from their own youth. “I think the legalization of cannabis has really blurred lines in terms of social norms and what’s acceptable,” he said.

Alongside those concerns, organizers highlighted efforts to make help more accessible, including expanding the availability of Narcan, the brand name of naloxone, the medication which reverses opioid overdoses. They reported three community locations with a fourth planned where the public can obtain free supplies of the medication, as well as access through school nurses’ offices.

They also included representatives from substance use and abuse resources at the event, including Catalyst CT/The Hub, Liberation Programs and Mountainside, giving residents opportunities to connect directly with providers.

Finding Hope in Working Together

After describing the challenges facing residents and the gaps in the mental health system, panelists found reasons for optimism in the room itself: town departments, community organizations and residents willing to have the conversation and work together.

For Zemo, that willingness reflected a pattern she has seen in Wilton — people identifying a need, sharing it and coming together to find a response. Cipolla pointed to the three town departments represented on the panel and the organizations gathered around them. Their responsibilities and approaches differ, he said, but they share a commitment to residents’ health, safety and quality of life.

“What’s important is that we collaborate,” he said. “We respect each other’s roles, and and that way we can complement each other.”

He likened that cooperation to an orchestra: “We all are playing different instruments, but when we come together, it’s great harmony.”

The relationships also give providers somewhere to turn when they cannot resolve a problem alone. Rowe described finding optimism in the kindness she encounters and the connections among people working toward the same goal. Britt-Friedman pointed to the programs already taking shape and the willingness to keep talking as reasons to believe the community can respond as additional needs become clear.

For Elias, being among those people was itself a source of support.

“Not just looking for the helpers, but being with the helpers gives me a ton of hope to be in community with people that are really committed to making a difference and being supported by them,” she said.

Making Sure Residents Know Where to Turn

While the providers said the collaborations give them hope, those collective efforts may not always be visible to the people who could benefit from what’s available.

A call between school staff and police, a question about whether a family qualifies for services or a request for financial assistance can set help in motion. Zemo described those exchanges as routine parts of the work, even though residents may never hear about them.

“So those things happen all the time, but they’re not necessarily publicized,” she said.

Making that work more visible presents its own challenge. Staff are busy providing services, Elias noted, leaving limited time to explain those services to the broader community. She suggested a part-time community liaison or communications position could help close that gap, while Rowe pointed to her department’s Facebook outreach as an example of efforts already underway.

Still, in telling residents what the department does, privacy needs to be protected. “It’s hard to give examples without people feeling like we’re alienating them,” she said. “So if you have a question, come to us.”

That invitation extended to parents who are uncertain about something happening with their child. School social workers, counselors and psychologists can offer observations from a different setting, compare concerns with families and help explore support. Parents do not need to wait until they have worked out exactly what is wrong before starting that conversation.

“Don’t hesitate to reach out if you have a question or concern or something that’s not going well,” Zemo said.

“We want to collaborate. We can talk confidentially.”

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